Saturday, January 08, 2005

Finally, a direction.

I have decided. I’m going to take the US medical licensure exam. I’ve been wandering aimlessly for four months now and I think it’s time to set a goal again. I realized that all my 26years, my life goal was to have the M.D. attached to my name. I thought everything would be alright from there. But no. Four months into being a doctor, I am lost. There are a lot of doors opening but I do not know which one to take. I’ve been bumming around for months. Not that I’m complaining, it has been wonderful. In fact, I’ve never enjoyed slacking more than ever.

I went back to the hospital last night to return some borrowed CDs to a friend who was starting residency. He looked 10 years older from the last time I saw him (which was only last month, by the way). He didn’t even smile when I handed him his stuff. He fumbled with his census and walked away. He was not in a good mood, I could tell. Must’ve gotten a dressing-down from the consultants that night. But it’s part of it all, something u have to accept before starting residency. I still refuse to come to terms with it, but that’s just the immature me. I will, of course, eventually go the same path. But not just yet. I’m not ready.


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